Life is but a weaving.

May 28 – My “baby” sister graduated high school.

June 4 – My childhood best friend married the love of her life.

June 29 – I learned that, for understandable reasons, my roommate is moving out at the end of July. So now I need to find a new roommate within a month and adjust to “losing” my roommate and friend.

June 30 – My boss and mentor, the woman who hired me, retired after 42 years of service. The next day, I learned who would fill her position and become my new boss.

July 1 – I helped my parents (& sister) move to start the next chapter of their life in PA, marking the first time in my 22 years I have lived in a city, let alone a STATE, different than my parents. Talk about transition!

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I include the timeline here primarily for my own journaling purposes, but I also hope it’s an encouragement to anyone reading who is in a period of transition. Know that the Lord is faithful!

In these last few weeks, I have realized that, humanly, this much “transition” in a small window of time is too much for a person to process and handle alone without going insane. The good news?  The Lord doesn’t ask or expect us to, but instead wants us to come running to Him.

The nights when the loneliness is too much to handle, He is there to be my companion. {Genesis 28:15 – I am with you and will keep you wherever you go.”}

The days when I wake up exhausted from crying myself to sleep the night before, He is there to give me strength to get thru the day and I find rest in the arms of the One who won’t let go. {2 Timothy 4:17 – “But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength.”}

The hours when my mind races at lightning speeds, searching for answers, He is there to give me wisdom, discernment, and clarity or, in some cases, patience to wait on Him. {Psalm 61:2 – When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.”}

The minutes of the days that I fight back tears from feeling unwanted and alone while surrounded by people, He is there to be my comfort. {Psalm 116:2 – “Because He bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath.”}

The seconds of every day that I pray for the Lord to be everything I need–my friend, my comforter, my peace, my companion, my protector–He is that and more for me. {Ephesians 3:20 – “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.”}

I find comfort in the lyrics of these songs:

“Never once has he left me, never once has he left me on my own. Never once did [I] ever walk alone, never once did You leave [me] on [my] own. You are faithful, God, you are faithful.” {Matt Redman, Never Once}

“I know with everything you’re with me, I know you’re working as I wait, Lift me up on wings like eagles, To soar.” {Meredith Andrews, Soar}

“Anytime a heart turns from darkness to light, Anytime temptation comes and someone stands to fight, Anytime somebody lives to serve and not be served
I know, I know, I know, I know, God is on the move, on the move, Hallelujah
God is on the move, In many mighty ways.” {7eventh Time Down, God Is on the Move}

“In the eye of the storm, You remain in control, In the middle of the war, You guard my soul, You alone are the anchor, when my sails are torn, Your love surrounds me in the eye of the storm, Mmm, when my hopes and dreams are far from me, and I’m runnin’ out of faith, I see the future I picture slowly fade away, And when the tears of pain and heartache are falling down my face, I find my peace in Jesus’ name.” {Ryan Stevenson, Eye of the Storm}

Lately, I’ve been obsessed with beautiful sunsets, mountain ranges, and cloud formations. As crazy as that sounds, they remind me of God’s sovereignty and His glory, as proclaimed in Psalm 19 which says, “The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of His hands.” I ran across this saying that I love, “Sunsets are proof that endings can be beautiful too.”

Being in a difficult season and being happy are not mutually exclusive. I am convinced it is all about perspective. It’s not happy people who are grateful; it’s grateful people who are happy. And so I choose to be grateful.

The Lord has been so faithful to provide exactly what I need when I need it. Here’s a quick list of the Lord’s provision in the past 4 weeks:

• He has developed relationships with amazing, godly friends who always have my back and are there to help me thru this time of transition.
• He has connected me with several new families that instantly welcomed me into their lives and have taken me under their wing, intentionally reaching out and involving me, making me feel cared for and loved.
• He has even given me amazing new friends that I instantly connected with because of our love for Jesus and life.
• He has given me the health and ability to play volleyball, the sport that I love, each week with a group of great friends.
• He has given me my awesome Bible study girls who are committed to living life with me.
• He has given me an amazing girl who, Lord willing, will be my new roommate! The story behind how this came to be within 24 hours of my initial need is incredible.
• He has given me technology to keep me connected with those I love, though distance separates us.

When I truly surrender my life and my plans to the Lord, I just watch in amazement as He takes it and shows off in miraculous and marvelous ways.

That said, I am not perfect. I struggle. I bleed red. I don’t have it all together. I fail daily. I don’t trust like I should. I’m impatient. I push my plan and forget to pray.  But at the end of the day, I can rest knowing I serve a forgiving God and the fate of my life rests in the hands of a loving, all knowing, patient, sovereign Heavenly Father to whom nothing ever “occurs.” This transition time is hard and painful. But the lessons learned and the habits formed give me perspective on how the Lord is using this situation to establish His plan and bring Himself glory.

A friend shared this poem by Corrie ten Boom with me and I hope it is as much an encouragement to you as it was to me:

Life is but a Weaving (The Tapestry Poem)

My life is but a weaving
Between my God and me.
I cannot choose the colors
He weaveth steadily.

Oft’ times He weaveth sorrow;
And I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper
And I the underside.

Not ’til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Will God unroll the canvas
And reveal the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful
In the weaver’s skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned

He knows, He loves, He cares;
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives the very best to those
Who leave the choice to Him.

~Corrie ten Boom

I will make it through because He carries me.